Administrary Blurb, Part 2.

Hey, I'm doing this for the second time! This must mean that it's going to be a tradition for something.

Why Baltarstar Frog? Initially, I thought I'd confuse people by just randomly changing the design and putting in new titles that sound vaguely like Baltarstar Blog. But you know, the frog seems very summery and nice, doesn't it? Maybe I'll keep this theme for a while. (And maybe I won't. I'm a mysterious kind of blogger!) Baltar didn't have a frog, as far as I know, but he totally should have. It would have relieved his pressures and guilt with its happy smile and amusing noises. The frog in question is named Deuteronomy, and he is hollow from the inside, with a hole in his head as well. I purchased him at a very low price in a flea market once, but this does not mean he isn't a valuable asset. He also functions as my Twitter and Facebook icon right now. And he's a huge James Callis fan, just like me.

I'm doing a TV meme on Livejournal, and BSG keeps coming up for some reason. Read on how I got into the show, who my favorite characters are BESIDES Baltar and Six, and which episodes are my favorite and least favorite, here. (I'm too lazy to make a direct link to each post. I realize they will be bumped down later, but for future reference, they were written in May 2010, and can be found around the 20th.)

So that's all of James Callis on FlashForward. That was awesome! The finale is yet to air, so we'll see if there's any further mention of Gabriel McDow, but I'm not really expecting that right now. I got a lot of views for these posts, including fun searches like "James Callis I like tomatoes" and "I hate pickles! I hate lettuce! I hate onions! I like tomatoes". James has gotten mixed reviews, but I'm not going to go over them and comment on them all, because a) I don't want to be the girl who never lets people talk about James without commenting and b) there are too many threads to keep tabs of.

I should add that with my last post, there were just so many issues to discuss that I forgot to mention how adorably chubby he was looking. Oh, dear! I am appalled and shocked at such negligence! Granted, if he is going to be chubby for a while, I might stop commenting on it in every post. (But please bear with me if I just can't!)

Re-Uniting the Rubins has NOT been shown at Cannes, it seems. I have no idea what's going on and am beginning to lose hope it will ever come out. But um, I will post news as I find them. It's a bit weird at this point.

Eureka starts airing on July 9th, and this means twenty episodes with James! Excellent! As you all know, I'm not a huge fan of the show, but maybe I'll change my opinion with James' episodes. Or maybe I'll just enjoy what I can and shut up about what I don't like in the show. Basically, the way I see it, Eureka is like Gilmore Girls, but it's about supposedly super-intelligent people. They don't usually act smarter than the townies in GG, but they have fun inventions and there are time distortions and such stuff. Which I basically find fun, as long as it's not TOO silly. We'll see where James falls on my "too silly - too serious" scale, but he has a good sense of humor, so we can at least expect good READINGS and fun expressions. Also, I did occasionally enjoy Gilmore Girls a great deal.

The Facebook thing. Um, eh, hmm. *shame* See, here's how it's going to be: I'm depressed. I can't hide it and I can't stop it from screwing up my perception of reality sometimes. It will come out in this blog and I'm sorry. Ideally, I'd like for this to be a tribute blog where I don't post negative stuff or doubts about James, but it seems like I can't avoid that. Maybe that means it's also personal in a good way and accurately reflects my admiration and respect for him.

MOST of the time, James is a positive thing in my life and the fandom has given me a lot of strength. I have no reason to think James doesn't like me, and it would be neurotic and morbid to go on thinking in that way. So I've resigned to not knowing what he thinks of me, but assuming the best.

So I continue to gush and will continue to post lots when something's happening. Unless James himself specifically requests it, I will not take down or stop writing this blog. (Or, as the case might be, frog.)

Random Thoughts o' the Week

I'm always dubious to call anything "weekly", because I probably won't end up writing every week and it looks silly. But let's just say these are random thoughts of this week, regardless if the thoughts ever come back or if they rush out into the darkness never to return.

Small personal update: I'm a bit more depressed lately, but having my meds adjusted and getting more therapy, so hopefully I'll have more energy for this blog and the LJ rewatch community soon. I feel like my writing is sub-par for now, but maybe that's just the depression talking. I'll be reporting on the news as soon as I see them, either way. If I sound lacklustre, it's because of my brain chemistry, not because I've lost interest in James.

A reader asked about James' glasses. I have no idea, but there's a thread at the Unofficial Website on the topic. Apparently it would be a Ray Ban model that someone identified. Read more here. It's interesting that his glasses fascinate people. Maybe also try having his hairdo (the long one)? Chicks dig that.

Still no con bookings for this year. Shooting Eureka in Vancouver, James is probably just too busy and not where the cons are. But who knows, maybe he'll be joining something on a shorter notice? I'll keep you posted. Looks like I won't be able to go to any con this year, judging by my finances, but it's always nice to hear about other people's experiences. Honestly, it is. I'm not envious AT ALL that you people get to talk to James and hug him and all that. (Grr.)

FlashForward: turns out we're only two weeks behind the US, and Revelation Zero, part 1 aired yesterday. Whoa! I'm going to see James soon, no doubt! I'm very excited about that - except that the pace of the show is still sssslllllooooowwww. I enjoy the premise and am still excited James will be on this show, but jesus. It may be an ABC thing, because I think the same is true of Lost. I didn't watch it when it first aired, partially because it's so painfully slow. Now, on DVD, I'm hooked on it, but only if I fast forward a lot of the scenes. There are characters I really care about, and characters I don't care about at all, and all of their back stories are expanded, so it's slow going. I have a feeling I'll love FF on DVD, but for now, we only have the slow-paced episodes. I just hope James will have some killer dialogue and great scenes that won't feel like watching paint dry. (Well, at least watching him and his subtle expressions is still interesting, no matter what's in the scene.)

Poll-wise, people seem pretty unanimous that they will watch James' episodes only, if a show he appears on is not something they'd otherwise watch. In fact, 100 % voted for that. I must admit I did peek at Eureka season one, but felt no need to watch the entire show, because it's apparently more of a sitcom type thing, not really a story with a plot you must follow. So I'm one of the "just watch his episodes" fans. You don't have to be a fan of the show to enjoy James' episodes. I hope.

I was looking through the archives, and looks like I have an anniversary coming up - one year of obsessing over James+donuts! I expected it to go away but, um, it hasn't really. It's been a juicy year. Mmmmm, donut gut. (L)!

A softer side of James. All cuddly and sweet. Plus: Tricia. I'm not sure which one turns me on more. *drool*

Speaking of James' physique - some people apparently felt uncomfortable with the James' body poll, so I've removed it. Let me know if I sound annoyingly objectifying or disrespectful or whatever. I probably wouldn't enjoy a poll asking ppl if they prefer me muscular, chubby or skinny, and maybe James wouldn't feel very good about it either. Sorry, James. It wasn't a serious thing for me. I love you just as you are (and also chubbier).

It's becoming harder and harder to google anything James-related, because there is a shocking amount of spam. I don't get it. Is it because people are googling James so much right now? Or because some spambots are creating spam based on your search? "James Callis shirtless" amuses me, but the day it turns up "james callis donut porn james callis donut eating contest james callis donut gut james dunkin donuts" type stuff, I will freak out. And can I just, once again, frown upon the "james callis alexander siddig" crap. People, they look nothing alike. Nothing at all. I do not see the resemblance, and I've spent a fair amount of time staring at James Callis pictures. I have nothing against Mr Siddig, but every time his face turns up in a James search, I get a bit annoyed with him. I wonder if Siddig fans feel the same way about James, coming to think of it.

That's about it for now. More James news hopefully soon.

Administrary Blurb

Unrelated James image. Well, he is saluting the readers or something. Yeah, it's totally related.

I felt like making a sort of "beginning of the year" administrative post. Hi people, we got through January safe and sound. We'll see what this month brings!

News: Umm. Re-Uniting the Rubins has been pushed back til spring, it seems, but rest assured that when it comes out, I will get it in my hands somehow and blog about it.

The truth is, I have no idea what James is doing this year. I haven't heard of any projects or con appearances. I'm hoping he'll still be added to various con lineups, and of course I'm always on the lookout for new projects. There will be news once they're out on the internet. Since I have no contact with James or anyone who works for him, I unfortunately can't publish anything exclusive.

However, if you're out of gushes and need your fix, there's still plenty of material. I have some old stuff to blog about that I have been putting off, what with so many appearances last year. There are his old projects, some old transcripts, and I still haven't made a proper Jules Verne Awards post! So this blog will not have a hiatus, no matter what. I'm also posting LJ community stuff here, at least temporarily, since LiveJournal is refusing to cooperate with me. It's all James/Tricia photos and recaps, so it's on topic.

Lots of BSG communities and sites are now becoming Caprica communities and sites. I'm going to keep this blog very much James Callis-related, with some BSG thrown in. The show is over for me, with my beloved characters coming to the end of their arcs (and I don't mean only Baltar). I'm not ready to engage in a new show and its characters simply because of the same canon. So at least for now, no Caprica here.

I'm going to make a post about James' HAIR, which really deserves to be capitalized. But before that, the Hair Poll has been extended. In case you don't know what "Long like Sex&Chips" looks like, look here. Yes, it may be extensions - I almost spelled that "sextensions"! - but at least to me, it looks great. (As you may deduce from that Freudian slip.)

There's also a new poll regarding the Twitter sidebar. Twitter started out as a simple way to post James links and other fun stuff, but I realize it's become increasingly about me, myself and I. Since this is a James blog, you might not all be utterly fascinated by me. Plus half the time I post something about James, it's a direct link here: "I blogged this and that". I could start talking more about James and finding related links, or I could just remove it from the sidebar if people feel it's a bit superfluous. So let me know what you think.

Speaking of me, myself and I: If you use Facebook and want to add me, I'm in as Deniselle Baltar. (I know, but I thought they wouldn't allow me if I don't use SOME last name.) The account is personal, not a James fan/blog account. I'll add you if I know you (or send me a personal message and let me know who you are). There are a couple of James fan communities on Facebook and they don't seem particularly active, but who knows what would happen if more people joined?

The blog's Youtube account: I'm still favoriting James videos, but when Youtube reinvented itself somehow some months ago, it lost all of my old playlists. I'm going to work on recollecting the videos I had - mostly old James panels/interviews and such stuff. If it lets me make playlists of things I haven't added myself.

I must admit I did have an idea of doing podcasts. It might have been fun. But apparently my webcam makes GINORMOUS videos that take up a lot of space, yet aren't that good with the image and audio quality. So eh, maybe we forget about that idea. It would have been nice to have a voice online, literally, but maybe it's not so essential, as I don't have much else to report than my usual James ponderings. (I could have made an extended series of My Autograph, which would have featured kissing the autograph, talking to it, and crying. Just kidding. Kind of.)

Also, I feel like I haven't been silly in ages, so I might post something totally silly sometime soon. Or not. We'll see if the mood strikes... ;)

"Silly? Oh my... giddy aunt!"

A Deep Post. Because I'm Not Shallow.

I just have to post something so that the bum post isn't on top. Because, you know, Elina already referred to this as my "bum blog". :D

Honestly, I'm not a shallow person! This blog is about James Callis and what an awesome actor and person he is, not about his body parts. And if it were about body parts, I should always give the biggest attention to the donut gut (where applicable!), because it doesn't get enough attention otherwise. But this post is not about that! This post is deep and profound.

Here's something deep: James posed for a "Lisa Walks" photo, found here (scroll down). If you donate 20 bucks, you can get a print of the photo. The money goes to breast cancer research. I really like the compassionate look on his face and the fact that he holds the bear to his chest. (L)!!! Very thoughtful. Great photo for a great cause. There was also an auction with the bear he had signed (and held to his chest, drool) but sadly, the auction is already completed.

Did I manage to drool again? Oh dear. Hmmm. *Googles "James Callis"+profound*

OK, let's see, the show cast relates their most profound memories...

After filming the miniseries, Callis was asked to stay in Vancouver to finish a final shot called a pickup. He got an envelope with instructions on what they'd be shooting. "I open it up. It's like, 'Baltar removes Six's plastic knickers.' And I'm like, 'What?' They're like, 'We didn't get it on the day, James.' And I'm like, 'You are kidding me?' They're like, 'No.' 'That's why I'm staying back in Vancouver? I've got to take black plastic knickers off.' 'Yes, we need it. We need the shot.' That was just terribly funny, the idea that out of this whole space opera and drama that was the one shot they needed of us," laughs Callis. 'They didn't need our faces. ... That is a cute little memory I will hold."

You're not helping, James!! Since when is that profound? I know he doesn't mention the donut gut but that's exactly where my mind went. Also I wish he had mentioned it, because I want to hear how he'd describe it... Sigh.

Completely unrelated to his looks! The results of the nickname poll.

Cornelius	0 (0%)
Deuteronomy	1 (14%)
Gaylord	1 (14%)
Gengulphus	3 (42%)
Just James	2 (28%)

Looks like his full name is James Gengulphus Callis. I must admit I voted for Gengulphus, even if I don't really think he has a middle name. He must be middle-name-less, because he even tells us his children's names. Why would he hide his own middle name?

I actually had a dream about him being credited as "James H. Callis" or "James Callis H." in some older things (Soldier Soldier?) and I was really excited to get to guess on his middle name. (I guessed Henry, and conveniently remembered his grandfather was named that.. this is true only in the dream.)

Sadly, I thought of the best option after I posted the poll: James Travis Callis. Almost the same as his last name, and always a fun name. Travis! (L) Maybe James should change his name to Travis, coming to think of it. Then I could laugh each time I hear his name.

Well, here's something non-shallow: a hot picture of James. There's a comment that lists his good sides:

1) nice; 2) personable; 3) thoughtful; 4) funny; 5) sweet; and 6) h-o-t hot. smouldering smoking hot in person. way way way hotter than on the show.

Awww. (L) I may have linked to this on the dragon con 2008 post, but that was ages ago, so re-linkage FTW! (Also: suspenders.)

As a deep and profound person, it annoys me that there are so many of these "guys" lists online. I stumble upon them with every search. Basically, you're supposed to bold the ones you'd shag, strikethrough the ones you'd never touch, etc. etc. and almost everyone uses the question mark with James, as in they've never heard of him. So it's a completely useless mention of his name that comes up in every search. I might be more lenient towards it if he was mentioned as someone people want to shag. But now, I pronounce this list a complete spacewaster. For shame!

I think this post adequately showcases my depth and coresponding lack of shallowness. Mission accomplished.

On Blogging About James Callis.

What do you post when you've been blogging for a year? I don't want to make a huge big celebration post, because those are never quite as big and celebratory as you had hoped. But I've been wanting to post something meta, so I'm going to ramble about blogging about James Callis. As opposed to rambling about James Callis (although I'm sure I will do that too before the post ends).

I can honestly say I still enjoy writing this blog, and I'm still as into James - or even more so - as I was when I started. These are things I couldn't really count on when I started the blog. You never know with fan feelings. I can also say, to my astonishment, that I've had... *checks* 8,789 views to date. That's amazing. I thought my blog would kind of disappear into the mass of possible other fan blogs and sites. I'm still surprised there aren't more pages about James Callis out there. It feels odd to think that this blog might be a resource for people looking for information on him. I feel proud and humble at the same time.

When I started, I didn't know anything about James Callis fans (nor did I know much about James Callis, coming to think of it). I didn't know what I was getting into. I'm not sure why this is, but I seem to have an easier time starting a blog than going into a forum and saying hi to people. Maybe this has changed a bit, since I am more confident now than I was a year ago. However, the blog itself has proven a good way of meeting new people. I feel a bit guilty for my lacklustre behavior at forums lately. I'm just not that good at writing at forums, and since there aren't many people talking there, the conversations run dry so quickly. We have great conversations on twitter though, so maybe we've just changed the place of discussion.

Blogging about fandom is a very personal thing for me. I try to be honest and open about my own reactions. What you see here is all from the heart: my love, my joy, my humor and - hopefully not too often - my disappointments. Sometimes I wonder if I write for myself, for the fans, or James. If I found out James doesn't care to read the blog, would my own interest wane? I like to think I'd still blog here; writing is my way of dealing with emotions. I transcribe to get to know James and hear his views on things. I read con reports to see how he interacts with other fans. I'm trying to get to know him, and even if my image of him is probably always an illusion, at least it's something very dear to me. It's my personal HeadJames.

Does the fandom also have a collective HeadJames who belongs to all of us? Sometimes in discussions, I feel like we all see the same person: smart, funny, modest and talented, and very, very kind. His love and warmth is for all of us, and it makes us better people. I'm making it sound like a religion. :D Is fandom a religion of sorts? Is fangirl high a spiritual experience? It does elevate me and give me something to believe in. Elina and I met recently and joked about Jamus religion where we'd worship James, but is there a bit of truth to that? Are we the Callis Cult?

OK, I joke about being obsessive, but seriously, I hope that the blog comes off more "warm and admiring" than "obsessive and stalkerish". I do worry about this sometimes. I think about James a lot, but so far, it's only brought positive things (above all, a positive diversion from my depression thoughts). Fandom has to be a little intense, or it doesn't feel as good. That said, if I start to sound like a stalker, please let me know.

I've had some rules with this blog, all pretty much based on the idea that James is a real person somewhere. He's my HeadJames, yet not. He's not a figment of my imagination - or even Ron Moore's - and I can say what I want about Gaius Baltar, but not about James Callis. I've tried to think of what would offend me or freak me out. I hope the blog is respectful and hasn't hurt anyone's feelings. At the same time, I don't want to gush too much. If I don't like something, I'm going to say that. I wouldn't respect a fan who can't criticize anything about me, and I don't want to be that kind of fan.

Sometimes it's hard to draw the line. If someone says something rude about James, what is my role? To defend him? To ignore it? He can speak for himself if something truly bad happens. On the other hand, people shouldn't assume they can say just anything about a celebrity. I didn't have a great experience with defending him, so maybe I'll keep out of that in the future. James probably wouldn't want his fans to start online feuds, so I won't. Unless someone says something that really pisses me off. (I suspect this isn't the last we'll see of Deniselle the defender.)

In only two weeks (!!), Pedda will get me James' autograph. That might change something or nothing in the way I feel about him. An autograph is a name on paper, so I try not to expect too much. It might mean a lot though, especially if it's also MY name written by HIM. Plus I think I'll ask him to draw a dog. I hope he obliges. I'm very curious to see his drawing style. I'll probably be at least a little sad that I'm not personally at An Evening With James Callis, but I'll try to be impartial as usual and keep my calm, matter-of-fact composure. Stiff upper lip!

I've often been complimented on my ability to find James goodies on Google and other sites. To celebrate the anniversary, I thought I'd share a few of my secrets:
-Looking for "James Callis" will give you page upon page of junk sites ("Find all the latest info!!! News item 0 of 0".) You need to type in the full name because "James" is hardly unique (I envy Tahmoh fans), but for valid results, always use other search terms along with the name. Vary the terms and try advanced searches. Be imaginative. It won't always help, but you never know.

-Google blogsearch, on the other hand, is less cluttered than the regular search. "James Callis" will give you many interesting results. However, it won't find everything, so don't rely on it exclusively. "Last week", "last 24 hours", etc. always gives more reliable results, because old posts tend to linger on the blogsearch. LiveJournal entries don't always turn up this way.

-Finding pictures on Google image search is a mess. Try Flickr.com and their search ("Most recent" is usually a good qualifier). Search not only for "James Callis", but also "Gaius Baltar", because there are way too many people who don't know his name. Ditto Photobucket.

-Fan sites are almost always more interesting and detailed than big entertainment sites. Forums are a good place to find personal meeting stories or fan observations. Sometimes you have to search thru a forum topic to find the relevant items, though.

-Cons are a pain to search. For instance, James has been at the 07 New York City Comic Con, the 08 San Diego Comic Con, the 09 San Diego Comic Con, and I'm sure I'm already omitting some. As a result, you get way too many old and useless results with name+comic con. Always use advanced search with specific terms. James Callis+con name+city the con is at, then pick "last 24 hours" or "last week" on advanced search. Be patient and search every day for a week or two if you want to see it all. You can bookmark the search for convenience. (Or, if no one else has the obsession to do this, you can check my blog. :D)

-Try locating sentences inside the text that mention something James said or did. "James Callis"+"James said" or "James Callis"+"he said" might turn up something interesting. (Although the latter can also be misleading because "he" might refer to someone else; this type of search is for patient moments only.)

-Don't expect to find any wild details on his personal life. What you see on the Unofficial website is all you get. There are no photos of his wife or children online.

-Sites promising "james callis porn" are all random spam. Sadly.

I want to send a friendly hello to all the people who read my blog regularly. It makes me so happy that you enjoy the blog and continue to read. If you want to post sometime, feel free to do so; anonymous commenting is enabled here. I read every comment before I publish it, but unless you're blatantly hateful or selling a product, I will probably publish whatever you have to say. Don't feel pressured to comment, however; I can still see you visited and appreciate it. (And don't be freaked out that I can see you; I'm not nerdy enough to do anything with your sitemeter info.) My email is deniselleDOTswanATgmailDOTcom, and all emails are welcome.

Fandom has a life span, and it's not necessarily something I can control. I can't make any promises about sticking around. (Although I was an Ace Of Base fan for almost 15 years, so if that's any indication...) I can only promise that I'll always be honest and open about how I feel, and post in this blog as long as it's fun. I do hope the blog will be around still next year and keep entertaining me and, if possible, others as well.

Let's keep the torches burning and the chanting going, and worship the one and only James Callis, artiste and warm person extraordinaire!

Jamen.

Ramble Baubles

I feel like rambling today, so I will. Every post doesn't need to have something of value. Right? I feel like announcing upcoming features though, so maybe I see this blog as some kind of news channel for James fans lately. There has been a flurry of new James stuff, so there's a lot I haven't posted.

Things I'm planning to post in the near future:
-James Callis/Mark Sheppard part 2 from Starfury - seriously, I will get to this one day.
-James quotes from the Jules Verne press conference and a more coherent quote/added commentary on the actual event ones.
-MegaCon panel James bits transcript.
-Other interview transcripts.
-Sex, Chips & Rock'n'Roll, Going Wrong, Heat of the Sun, As If, Soldier, Soldier etc. - some sort of reviews or discussions since I have seen all of these and have some things to say. (But since they're all so old, I'm thinking they can wait until I feel like it, whenever that may be...)

Oh, and watch this interview. It's so funny. "He's trying to save his own ass" - touches his bum* - "had to touch it to check it's still there!" Heee :D I don't know if it's that
a) he touches his bum,
b) he says that,
or
c) the underlying idea of his bum makes me horny,
but I have been just rewatching that bit over and over. And it's just generally a good interview. Done in France during Jules Verne, James is very cute, and is NOT dubbed over, thank Dieu.

* = James points AND giggles for using "bum". Heh heh, "bum"!

OK, on to rambling. These are some random baubles from my brain today.

I'm pretty excited about the baby. I was having a bad week, but I've been walking on clouds since that post by James. My girlfriend asked me yesterday, all concerned: "You haven't changed your mind about not having children, right?" She claimed it wasn't because of James' baby, but I don't know. I'm not having any children with her, that's for sure - you should see the way she tortures her Sims families.

About the name:
I was initially surprised, because to me, Annika is a very Scandinavian name. It's quite common around here, as well. I thought they'd pick something either Jewish or Indian, so it struck me as off character. That's not to say that they're restricted to the Jewish/Indian tradition only - if they wanted to call her Astrid Åsa Gunhild, more power to them. But people generally have a specific naming style, and I thought I had them pegged.

Then I found out that Anika with one N can also be a Hindi name - it's another name for the goddess Durga, who's a pretty fierce character, at least based on the Wikipedia article. (I must confess to my utter ignorance of Hindu culture. I didn't really understand any of it.) It could also be a form of the Jewish-origin Anna, but since they have used the one N form, I'm guessing the Hindi connotation is more important. I'm not sure how they're pronouncing it, though. Maybe a longer ee sound?

Some more name ponders for those who care:
-All of James' children have names ending in -a (Joshua, Sacha, Anika). In fact, James is the only one in the family whose name doesn't end in -a.
-Joshua's middle name is Amaan, which means he has altogether six A's in his name. All of the names are pretty A heavy, so we can conclude James and Neha like the letter A.
-James and Joshua both have the initials JC.
-What's James' middle name? Does he have one? I've never seen it listed anywhere. Is he Just James? Maybe it's something really embarrassing, so he doesn't want it to be known. I remember one of P.G. Wodehouse's stories had a man named Lemuel Gengulphus. He went by his last name only. You never know.

Anika is about one month old now. (L)!

Today marks two months of donuts, although I must admit I'm not quite as obsessed with it anymore (especially in light of the baby news). Just let me know if there are any aspects of James' five-year-old weight gain story I haven't addressed yet. I would happily go deeper into it. Anyone? Hello? Well, I guess I'll... shut up then... (sigh... Not even a direct quote from James anywhere!)

Someone posted a bunch of Starfury photos on flickr, now that I'm no longer updating the Starfury post. Well, here they are in the search - pretty awesome shots. (Hmm, he looked ever so slightly chubbier in Starfury, didn't he? *drool*)

"Click on profile for a picture of a short, drunk, painfully British man." Short and drunk, OK, but what's so painful about being British?

...Apparently this:

It was an attitude slight on him alone. The poor guy was so uptight no matter how many Guinesses we gave him. I have nothing at all against the British, but he acted the stereotypical part the entire night. Nice enough guy, but really needs to loosen up.

Okay. So he was - what? Polite? Not dancing naked on the tables? Not doing whatever you consider cool? Whatever. I'd be concerned if people went around saying he goes really CRAZY at cons after drinking so much.

Flight of the Falcon audio book: Finished it. I thought it was really captivating at first, maybe because of the voices and accents James got to do. I liked the first two discs as well as the last two, but in between, the story kind of dwinled to nothing as tons of Italian person and street names were listed. Disappointing. It was still lovely to hear James' voice though, and he really lived in the story right til the end. I did enjoy some aspects of the story. I hope I'll get to hear his children's book readings some day too.

Had a dream about James. Subconscious mind, I am very disappointed in you today. You call that a fan dream? You could have given me a surprise meeting with hugs and kisses, or wild sexual practices I dare not dream of while awake. What did you give me? Me sitting on the other side of the room, shyly staring at James as he talks to other fans. And not daring to go to him. That was a weak show.

Maybe my mind is trying to tell me something about going to Starfury in November. Long story short: some people are tentatively going, and James will be there. It'd be a great chance to meet him and some fans, and to see London again. But but.

I've thought about this a lot. While I'd love personal contact with James, con meetings are so... impersonal. From what I've heard, you stand in line up to an hour and a half, then pay to get an autograph and/or picture, get a brief chat, and then it's time for the next person to meet him. There are hundreds of people, it's like a conveyor belt. James is great at these meetings, because he's great at meeting new people and making them feel welcome. So I'm not exactly nervous about him being rude or arrogant or dissing me or something.

However, I'm not sure what to expect. What's my role as one of the James Callis bloggers? Am I just another fan in line to meet him, or should I expect something more out of it? Does he read my blog, and will it be awkward if he doesn't? Will it be awkward if he does? Will I be able to stop myself from ruffling his chest hair and patting his tummy (or lack thereof) and telling him to eat more donuts or something? (And if I did those things, would he like it?)

Furthermore, I can be very shy at first meetings. I worry I'd dissolve into a puddle of fangirl goo and not be able to utter one sensible word - and then it'd be time for the next person to talk to him and my possibly only chance of talking to James would be lost.

I'm really not sure what to do. The risk of disappointment is high, but it could also be really awesome. I could observe with my own eyes what he has on his table, and report any possible Coke-drinking or other fetish items. I could bring him something. I could get a photo with him. .. I don't know. I'm very yes-no yes-no right now. But with almost six months to go, I'm sure I'll make up my mind by then. We'll see.

I think I've rambled enough for tonight and it's time for bed. James on you all!