Monday, March 14, 2011

Ideas for 17th Precinct...

Confirmed actors:
Jeff - James Callis
Caolan - Jamie Bamber
Morgana - Tricia Helfer
Right on! So what could these three get up to? I have a few ideas... :D

(Ron Moore if you use these please be fair and pay me OK? xoxo D) 

Can't Buy Me Love
Jeff's ex-wife (played by Lucy Lawless) shows up in town all sexy and in a huff, demanding more child support. Jeff's conscience takes the visible shape of Morgana in a blonde wig. Meanwhile, Caolan keeps seeing a strange blonde lady too (played by Katee Sackhoff). His longing takes the physical form of binge drinking and he ends up chasing a pigeon with a broom for ages. No crimes are solved in this episode.

A Rose by Any Other Name 
Jeff decides that his name is completely boring and unfitting to his androgynous British charm. He goes and changes it to Sebastian D'Ubervilles. Susan, who has been bonding with Jeff because of their dull names, breaks up with him. Caolan notices changes in his wife's appetite, but can't figure out why. Will Jeff change his name back? In the actual plot, the town is swept by a wave of mysterious murders, and the murderer always leaves a rose on the crime scene. But when you sniff it, it smells like something quite different. Is it a real rose? Is the murderer a rose-inventing magician? Could this be more contrived? I'm no good with police plots.

I think I need to yank the horniness higher and it will improve my ideas.

A Chest Hair's Stroke Away 
When the Chest Hair Strangler (Callum Keith Rennie) terrorizes the town, Jeff develops a mysterious rash which doesn't allow for him to wear a shirt. Seeing his delicious chest hair and tummy all the time, Morgana realizes her horniness could be the very key to solving the case...

Sexual Liaisons
Caolan and Jeff get more than a little bi-curious, and one thing leads to another... In the police plot, some guy is murdered with a baseball bat up his oh who the hell cares, sex all around!

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