Friday, April 17, 2009

Angels

One of the final David Eick video blogs is "Do you believe in angels?" James' response is a bit unclear - it sounds more academic than personal, as if the short answer is "not really", but he wants to expand on it and give the question the gravity it deserves.

"I think the way to answer this question is to start, really, with Gaius Baltar. You know, he sees.. Six, and he sees Baltar, and I think there's lots of things you could call them, maybe spirits, apparitions, um... But one of the things you could call them is angels."
I wish the show had tried to explain this a little bit. What are angels in the BSG universe? Are they spirits of the dead like Kara (if she is an angel)? What are HeadSix and HeadBaltar? In one way, it's good that it was left open, but in another way, it bugs me a bit. But not to get into this debate all over again.

"Angels are... I think of them iconically as people, in that western way, you know, appearing. And people embodying that idea... Well, I think people, personalities, do embody lots of... archetypes. Almost... it's like grooved into our DNA. We're, like, ritualistically inclined."

Professor James! Nice to see you again. But what is he saying, really? That he doesn't believe in angels, but he does have these western ideas that are ingrained in us through culture? Or that he does believe in them, because of our culture? Or something else? I'm not sure what he's trying to communicate here, and I feel this way about basically all religion-related comments I've heard him make. It's like he knows a lot about the topic, in an academic sense, but doesn't really know where he stands in terms of actual spirituality.

"People do perform functions in your life where they guide you, where they help you, where some ray of hope comes out of ... literally, the darkness, you had no idea."

OK, I'm gonna have to be awkwardly personal once again, because this really struck a chord in me. In my depression over the last few months, one of the biggest rays of hope has been James. It feels weird to think about it. I didn't even know about him a year ago, and now he means so much to me. He's given me something to do, new things to find, someone to look up to and fantasize about. I believe it's made me grow as a person. Through him, I also got to know fellow fan M, who was there for me and helped me understand that I needed help. I would never have met her if it weren't for James.

I don't want to say that James stopped me from killing myself, because my final thoughts were always of my girlfriend and family. But he's definitely one of the reasons that I've found life worth living lately. He's my angel.

2 comments:

Elina said...

Something I meant to ask - how did you end up watching Galactica? Considering that you didn't just turn on the tv and start watching, since it wasn't on at that time. Did you get recommendations from someone? I understand you weren't a James fan before either?

Deniselle said...

Maybe I should blog about my brief fandom history. I have a friend whose taste I greatly appreciate, he's shown me a lot of really good movies and shows. He was going on and on about BSG and boring me really :D It didn't sound like my kind of show, but I had a little extra cash and the boxes were cheap at Anttila, so I decided to sample it. (And I thought, "Ugh, a sexy woman in the cover, how good can this be?")

I was immediately attracted to Gaius Baltar on all levels. The James fandom came a little later, because I was timid to find out about him lest I'd be disappointed. Little did I know what kind of guy he is :D Still can't believe I've only been disappointed once in... what? Ten months now? He's amazing. Gush!

In short, James was irresistable to me from the first time I listened to an audio interview. He's just so loveable. I should blog about this more sometime. Maybe when the one-year anniversary rolls around.